Dogs and Babylonian Numerology.

I suppose you still remember the lesson of my last class where I taught you some basic Iraqi dialect.

I now see that some serious rehearsal took place since that last lesson - Everything you need to know about Shoes - and resulted in some empirical knowledge in the application of shoes.

Let us recap from Lesson 1:

PAPPAZ = STOOGE, PUPPET, CLOWN, JESTER...

BOOMA = VERY STUPID/DUMB

ENTA KUNDARA = You're a Shoe. Or,

IBN Al-KUNDARA = Son of a Shoe. Or,

SHLON KUNDARA = What a Shoe!

WIJHAK WIJH AL-KUNDARA = Your face is like a shoe.

BIL KUNDARA = a threatening remark involving the potential use of a shoe.


But I thought to myself, should I ever retire from my "educational" role, would my conscience be satisfied ? The answer is NO.

I feel I failed to teach you more essentials from the Iraqi vocabulary and I fear that your empirical applied knowledge of shoes would not have the full desired impact.

Hence prepare yourselves for another lesson in Iraqi colloquial. This time the subject matter is the noun DOG and the use of the DOG noun in complex sentences.

So let us start with basics, shall we ?

You may jot down the following transliterations, as they will come in very handy when operating with shoes.

Lesson 2

BASICS

KALB = DOG

YA KALB = YOU DOG

ENTA KALB = YOU ARE A DOG (affirmative)

Now let's go for a slightly more advanced usage of the word dog, involving first of kin.

LEVEL 1.

IBN AL KALB = SON OF A DOG.

YA IBN AL KALB = YOU SON OF A DOG.

ENTA IBN KALB = YOU ARE A SON OF A DOG. (extra affirmative)

For the feminine - use BINT instead of Ibn and ENTEE instead of Enta (will come in handy when Hillary Clinton and Madeleine Allbright will join the Obooma, again)

Now for the insertion of the word Dog in a more elaborate syntax.

Previous sentences involved first of kin, now I want you to bear with me and learn the second level, which is slightly more complex.

LEVEL 2.

A variation on level 1, but more linguistically powerful would be:

YA KALB, IBN AL KALB, IBN AL SET'ASH KALB = YOU DOG, SON OF A DOG, SON OF SIXTEEN DOGS. (set'ash = sixteen).

The interesting thing about the above sentence is the numerological function of 16.
Why 16 and not 17, 19 or 20 ? A clear reference to the 16th next of kin, down the father's lineage. One may call that - a generational insult.

As you will notice, the numerological equation involving the usage of DOG(S) will get slightly more difficult as we proceed along...

YA KALB IBN AL KALB, IBN AL SEETEEN KALB = YOU DOG, SON OF A DOG, SON OF 60 DOGS.

Again, the interesting number 6 pops up but this time, the insult involves 60 generations...of dogs.

However there are limits to the usage of number 6 and the sentences usually stops at 66. Even though the following is not as widely used at the previous two, but it is still in current practice. Therefore feel free to bring it back in full vogue.

YA KALB IBN AL KALB IBN AL SET'A WA SEETEN KALB = YOU DOG, SON OF A DOG, SON OF 66 DOGS.

As you have rightly observed, in this context, the genealogy goes back to the 66th ancestor - all dogs.


Of course, in this short linguistic course, you may need to draw on some esoteric, numerological notions revolving around the number 6 and its derivatives, namely 16, 60 and 66.

If you fail to come up with any plausible explanation for this, you can always call on Bernard Lewis, the in-house historian for the Zionists - Israel and America.

I heard that he has recycled himself into numerology as of late, now that his historical and political expertise were sought and put into practice by the White House and resulted in the occupation of Babylon - Iraq.

In any event, please continue rehearsing, lesson no.1 on Shoes and lesson no.2 on Dogs.

And you can always offer your IRAQI flavored "farewell kisses" now that you saw them in practice. Don't forget - practice makes perfect.

Bonne Continuation...

Your Linguistics's Professor,

Layla Anwar.


Painting : Iraqi artist, Adel Dawood.