Eyes Wide Open...

Damn it, it's very late here...it's actually morning but Insomnia beat me to it.

Actually it's not really Insomnia...this is just a pretext...it's actually words that have been waiting to be birthed at Sunrise...

My eyes are wide open...I happen to sweat the not so small stuff...that kind of keeps me awake, alert...my poor body is probably paying the price...but then it would pay the price anyway...

You see, my female body is a nothing...

Texts and discourses wrote themselves on its well guarded virgin pages...everyone out there told me what my body is, or should be...size, height, weight, contours, circumference, concave, convex...hidden or covered, clothed or naked...spread out or tightly held...it's all been an injunction, the famous word...that word, that verb, and God was the word and maybe God is in my body...and maybe that God does not want to go to sleep...maybe that God in that form, has something to tell you...maybe....

It may not sound right..surely God can't be a female insomniac...surely if God is anything it would be the naked thinking Rodin, the one still trying to figure it out...deep thoughts...very deep thoughts...deep thoughts that got us nowhere...was it a case of sheer mental masturbation ? Men are so good at that - mental masturbation.  Men are so good at everything they do...aren't they ?

A collective wanking experience...dutifully named "civilization". I sort of wondered about civility...you know some off shoot of civilization...I found tidbits of it..scattered here and there...a female necklace with no owner...

Females abdicated long ago...they did...when you buried them alive in hot sands and offered them as sacrifices to your hungry god...later on you replaced his bulimia with yours and kept adding meat trophies to your list...

And meat, plenty of it, even for the best of vegetarian tastes...meat it is...meat is shall be...cannibals of the first order...digging rotting teeth into flesh...and the survivors from the cannibal's feast perpetrated your tradition....they tasted the flesh before offering it to you...who is better suited to taste the feminine than the female itself ?!

Thus you engaged in the orgy...like primates...and primates you have remained...

Thumping, jumping and scratching your heads....

Maybe after all am a zoologist, a wide awake zoologist hoping to find some missing link...


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