February 18, 2009

A Farting Contest...

By the way, this is my 500th post. I am not sure as to whether I qualify for some sort of jubilee prize/present or not...In any event, jubilee or no jubilee, I shall keep typing away...

I must admit, Al-Jazeera keeps disappointing me, predictably so.

Ever since Qatar decided to align itself to Iran, almost everything (I did say almost -- so please do to take into account my nuances) fall in favor of Iran.

The last in line was tonight's program called "Itijah al Muakess" -- opposing views/directions.

The program coincided with the 30th anniversary of the "Islamic republic of Iran", the so-called "Islamic revolution."

Two guests, hosted by Faysal Al-Kassem -- Dr. Faysal Al-Kassem (very important the doctor part). Arabs (and they are not the only ones) are always impressed with titles...

In order to impress the viewers even more, they invited an Algerian "doctor" by the name of Khewlefeh and another humble looking guest, residing in London by the name of Mahmoud Ahmed Al-Ahwazi.

I need to qualify. Al-Ahwazi is a SHIA Arab from the Arab Al-Ahwaz region colonized by Iran for the past 83 years. Al-Ahwaz comprises a total of 10 Million Arab inhabitants -- repressed, oppressed, detained, tortured, by Safavid Iran, precisely because they are Arabs.

This Algerian "doctor" was singing the praises of Iran. From the way he spoke it was TOO obvious that he was on some Iranian payroll. Mind you, he is not the only one...Moreover, this Algerian "doctor" was allowed way more air time to voice his paid opinions than his counterpart.

He spoke of Dignity, Honor, and the Islamic republic... He kept mentioning the date
-- 3rd February 09. Date in which Iran sent its first outer space satellite and he also mentioned about 100 times -- Hezbollah's divine victory. He was ecstatic about both...I would too, if I were on Iranian payroll.

My mother said : So, what did this satellite and Hezbollah do for us Iraqis or for Gaza ?

I nodded in an unspoken silent agreement.

Mind you, I also farted on the 3rd of February. I recall that event very well.

My gases were propelled into strata-sphere along with the Iranian satellite. My brother sitting in close proximity, nearly had a heart attack. But it turned out to be a false alarm - his heart attack, that is.

To my utter dismay, my personal satellite did not have any quantitative/qualitative effects on current events...in Gaza or elsewhere...

Okay I know, farting is not very sexy. But hey you can't blame me for it. After all am just ruled by my "female biology." The Mullahs said so, no ?

Am really very sorry, I can't continue this post -- am laughing way too hard.

But I can still manage to relay the following :

- Iran gave the American puppet KARZAI of Afghanistan, half a billion dollars as a token of "friendship"


- 11 muslim institutions in Gaza, are receiving funds from Iran conditional upon they convert to Iranian "Shi'ism" - which they did...

and last but not least

- Over 15'000 Iranians visit Iraq each month - that is nearly 250'00 per annum. Thousands have already acquired the Iraqi nationality. Iran rules the Iraqi "State", the Iraqi inteligence services, the Police, the Ministries, the Provinces... And as far as I can recall, Iraq is still occupied by the U.S of A.

Oops, sorry. I did it again. Can you spot my Iraqi satellite way up there ?

No grave consequences, I hope. It's just a fart...

Shall be continued, promise ! Once I stop laughing...

Painting : (exceptionally) Egyptian Artist, George Bahgoury